On Attachment

Stephanie Rigg
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On Attachment

Join relationship coach Stephanie Rigg in On Attachment, where she delves deep into all things attachment theory, love, relationships & intimacy - sharing her wisdom and experience to help you start making real changes in your life & relationships. 

  1. 2 DAYS AGO

    #197: What Avoidant People Need to Thrive in a Relationship

    In today’s episode, we’re exploring what avoidant attached people actually need to feel safe and secure in a relationship — and how partners can support that without self-abandoning. Avoidant attachment is often misunderstood — labelled as cold, distant, or commitment-phobic. But when we look beneath those surface-level behaviours, what we often find is a deep need for space, safety, and self-reliance. We’ll cover: Why space needs to be respected, not punishedThe importance of having a partner who can self-regulate rather than emotionally offloadHow clear, direct, and honest communication builds safetyThe value of each partner having a full, meaningful life outside the relationshipWhy pacing matters — and how moving too fast can trigger shutdownBalancing lightness and heaviness Whether you’re avoidant yourself or in a relationship with someone who is, this episode will help you better understand the conditions that allow these relationships to thrive. Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    22 min

  2. 8 JUL

    #196: How & Why We Self-Abandon in Relationships

    If you deeply fear abandonment, there’s a good chance you’ve also been abandoning yourself in quiet, subtle, and painful ways. In today’s episode, we’re exploring how fear of abandonment often leads to patterns of self-abandonment — especially for those with anxious attachment. We’ll look at why this happens, how it shows up in your relationships, and what it actually costs you when you disconnect from your truth just to stay connected to someone else. You’ll learn: Why self-abandonment is often a survival strategy rooted in early attachment woundsWhat self-abandonment looks like in dating and relationshipsThe trade-off between authenticity and connectionWhy the work must begin with us Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    19 min

  3. 1 JUL

    #195: Two Simple Principles for a Healthy Nervous System

    In today’s episode, I’m sharing two key principles for building a truly resilient, balanced nervous system — and why one without the other tends to keep us stuck. We’ll explore: Why nervous system health isn’t about being relaxed all the timeThe importance of deliberate stress exposure to build capacity and resilienceThe equally vital need to resource and nourish ourselves through rest, pleasure, and co-regulationHow to work with the natural ebb and flow of activation and recoveryA simple metaphor to help you reflect on how you’re currently supporting your systemWhether you’re feeling burnt out, dysregulated, or just curious about how to better support your emotional wellbeing, this episode offers a grounded, compassionate reframe of what nervous system care can look like. Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    11 min

  4. 24 JUN

    #194: When You Don’t Feel Like a Priority in Your Relationship

    If you often feel like you're fighting for a place in your partner’s life—like you’re always waiting to be chosen or noticed—this episode is for you. This is one of the most common experiences for people with anxious attachment: that persistent, painful feeling of being sidelined. Of giving so much, while wondering if you even matter to the person you love. And when that becomes a pattern, it can quietly erode your sense of self-worth. In this episode, I’m unpacking: Why anxiously attached people are so sensitive to feeling deprioritisedHow this dynamic often plays out in anxious-avoidant relationshipsThe emotional cost of constantly striving to be chosenWhat you can focus on to reclaim your power and stop abandoning yourself in the processWhether you’re currently in a relationship or reflecting on a past one, this conversation will help you make sense of what’s happening and offer practical ways to move forward with more clarity, dignity, and self-trust. Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    19 min

  5. 17 JUN

    #193: The Gifts of Anxious Attachment

    While it’s easy to focus on the struggles of anxious attachment — overthinking, people-pleasing, fear of abandonment — there are also real gifts that often go hand-in-hand with these attachment patterns. When held with awareness and intention, many of the traits we associate with anxious attachment can become powerful strengths in our relationships and our lives. I’ll be exploring: Why it’s important to move beyond pathologising anxious attachmentThe qualities that often develop through lived experience with this patternHow your sensitivity, attunement, and relational depth can become assetsThe difference between operating from fear vs. secure self-expressionHow to start embracing your relational gifts without losing yourselfWhether you're in the thick of healing or just starting to understand your patterns, I hope this episode leaves you feeling acknowledged for all that is beautiful about you! Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    12 min

  6. 10 JUN

    #192: Boundaries vs. Ultimatums

    In today’s episode, we’re unpacking the subtle (but important) differences between requests, boundaries, ultimatums, and dealbreakers. While these words are often used interchangeably, they carry different energies — and understanding those differences can help you communicate more clearly, hold your ground with integrity, and honour your needs without falling into patterns of control, people-pleasing, or collapse. We’ll explore: Why the energy behind your words matters more than the words themselvesWhat makes an ultimatum different from a boundary or dealbreaker The common trap of over-explaining instead of taking aligned actionWhy communication problems can't be solved in isolationHighlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    21 min

  7. 3 JUN

    #191: Pleasure, Rest, & Feeling Good in a Culture of Chronic Stress

    In this episode, we're exploring why so many of us struggle to access pleasure, rest, and a felt sense of wellbeing — especially in a culture that glorifies productivity, self-sacrifice, and chronic stress. If you've ever felt like slowing down or doing something just because it feels good triggers guilt, anxiety, or even restlessness… you're not alone. We'll look at: How chronic stress and hypervigilance disrupt our ability to feel goodWhy pleasure and rest often feel unsafe or unearnedThe role of the nervous system in receiving nourishment and joyHow burnout and self-worth issues intersectSmall, everyday ways to start rebuilding your capacity for pleasure and easeThis episode is a gentle invitation to notice the forces that have pulled you away from yourself — and to begin reclaiming the parts of you that long to feel good. Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    21 min

  8. 28 MAY

    #190: How to Stop the Anxious Spiral

    If you find yourself spiralling into anxiety — overanalysing a text, catastrophising worst-case scenarios, or feeling like your nervous system is in overdrive — this episode is for you. Today we’re talking about how to stop the anxious spiral before it takes over. I’ll walk you through what actually happens in your body and mind during a spiral, why it makes so much sense if you struggle with anxious attachment, and what you can do to interrupt that cycle in the moment. I’ll also share some longer-term strategies for building resilience and emotional regulation so these spirals become less frequent and less intense over time. We’ll cover: What triggers the anxious spiral and how it gains momentumSimple tools to calm your system and regain perspectiveWhy nervous system regulation is essential to breaking the patternHow self-worth plays a role in stopping spirals before they startWhether you’re in the thick of anxiety right now or want to feel more in control next time it hits, I hope this episode leaves you feeling more grounded, compassionate, and empowered. Highlighted Links FREE TRAINING: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Buy tickets - London Event Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    20 min
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About

Join relationship coach Stephanie Rigg in On Attachment, where she delves deep into all things attachment theory, love, relationships & intimacy - sharing her wisdom and experience to help you start making real changes in your life & relationships. 

Information

  • Creator
    Stephanie Rigg
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2025
  • Episodes
    197
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2025 On Attachment
  • Show Website
    On Attachment

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